Friday | November 24, 2017
Hundreds Of Dismayed Oakland Raiders Fans Wander Off
Thankfully the catwalk is caged else dozens of fans easily would have fallen to their deaths.

OAKLAND (CAP) - Devastated by their team's horrendous start to the season, hundreds of Oakland raiders fans left Sunday's game in the middle of the third quarter, wandering aimlessly through the parking lot and eventually meandering into the surrounding community. Most have not been heard from yet.

"It was like some weird Walking Dead thing," said one woman who watched the hoard exiting the stadium. "Although, zombies have never looked so downtrodden or despondent as those people did."

Other witnesses described fans shedding team gear as they shuffled through the parking lot, with one man down to nothing but his boxers and a styrofoam beer helmet with a straw dangling by his mouth. Another man was reportedly clawing at his silver painted face and crying that it burned like a hot fireplace poker.

"We spoke with the fan in question and while he does feel burned by his team, he was not actually physically on fire," said Oakland Police Chief Sean Whent. "We would recommend a psychiatric evaluation, but Derek Carr's performance is enough to put anybody over the edge."

Authorities said the bulk of fans who either wandered home or were picked up along the side of the road were found to be mentally sound, even if their choice of team to root for was not. Reports have surfaced of some fans making their way toward San Francisco because "that's where winners live."

"OMG, we don't want your deranged fans," said KNBR sports radio host Gary Radnich. "Except that guy who keeps screaming Why? at the sky. We'll take him.

"And I think these fans have lost their sense of direction if they're looking for winners," added Radnich. "Arizona's in the other direction."

While authorities do you hope to locate all of those who wandered off and return them to families and loved ones, some of the missing may not be a accounted for until February as their wives never see them during football season anyway.

- CAP News Staff

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