HOLLYWOOD (CAP) - As the newest season of The Biggest Loser gets underway, CAP News has obtained startling information about exactly how the show is able to produce such amazing weight loss stories. According to sources close to the NBC hit reality show, past winners have utilized a combination of drugs and/or diseases to obtain their incredible results.
"We were encouraged to have all kinds of unprotected sex at the Biggest Loser ranch, in addition to sharing needles to take intravenous drugs," said one at-home winner who asked not to be identified. "The list of diseases I contracted was as long as my needle-riddled arm, which definitely sucked from a health perspective.
"But from a weight loss perspective, it was awesome!" added the female winner. "I lost 125 pounds, which amounted to 48.83% of my body weight. Between me and you, there is no way I would have lost that much through diet and exercise alone."
Health professionals have questioned the show's astounding results since the first season aired in 2004, concerned over the methods by which such incredible weight loss has been attained in so short a time. U.S. Surgeon General Regina Benjamin released a statement confirming that her department does not "condone the use of AIDS or other communicable diseases as a means of losing weight."
"I guess it seems like common sense to me, but we really do frown upon that," said Benjamin. "I mean, I guess I can think of a few reasons why someone might want to get one of those diseases going in their lives, but weight loss is definitely not one of them."
Other health-related organizations have begun to weigh in on the revelation, with many supporting the Surgeon General's stance. However, the AIDS Action Committee notes this announcement brings a level of media attention to AIDS that the group hasn't enjoyed since the early '90s and "media equals money, so we'll take this."
"It's not fair. I had to win an Olympic gold medal and an NBA All Star MVP for anyone to care about my AIDS," said Magic Johnson. "But this old lady wins some crappy reality show with it and now it's all over the news? This woman is giving all of us AIDS-sters a bad name. Well, that and the fact that we have AIDS.
"If I still had my short-lived late night talk show, I would do a monolouge about this. And believe me, it wouldn't be positive," added Johnson. "It also wouldn't be funny, but it definitely wouldn't be positive."
In related news, Department of Education Undersecretary Brian Wilkins has announced the launch of a new government program aimed at the nation's middle school population that will focus on alternative health education. The new initiative, entitled AIDS, It's Not Just For Weight Loss Anymore, kicks off in 25 major metropolitan areas next month.
- CAP News Staff