Monday | December 22, 2014
OJ, Rather To Make Reality Show
Simpson and Rather talk over a missing cat case while waiting in line for donuts.

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. (CAP) - One is a seasoned newsman, a veteran of numerous political campaigns, brought down by the very industry he covered for 40 years. The other is an ex-football player, struggling, searching to find the murderer of his beloved ex-wife, a murder for which he was wrongly accused. Together, they're hooking up to create the most successful crime-fighting team since Starsky & Hutch.

Well, that's what Bravo is hoping, anyway. Provider of such ground-breaking reality programming as "Make Grandma A Ho" and "Dominatrix Dad", Bravo has signed Dan Rather and O.J. "Juice-E" Simpson to star in a new reality-based show this fall tentatively titled, "The Rather Juice-E Detective Agency".

"I'm as excited as a mudpuppy at a mayfly convention," Dan Rather recently told CAP News Entertainment Reporter Elisia Gibbons at a sit-down to promote the show. Rather's t-shirt, "The Frequency is 'CBS Sucks'," lends credibility to the rumors that his parting with his former network was something less than amicable.

"I'm with Dan," said O.J., himself clad in a "NWA" wife-beater. "This is a great opportunity, and it's just nice to be working agai - BITCH, WHERE BE MY COFFEE?! Sorry Elisia, I'm breaking in a new assistant. ACCENT ON BREAKING!"

Executive Producer David Kelly sees great potential in the pairing.

"On the one hand, you have a damaged, meek white guy. On the other, a damaged, raging Negro. What's not to love?" asked Kelly. "The dynamic of Rather's keen, investigative intellect and Simpson's ability to just fly off the handle and fuck someone up will have audiences desperate to tune in."

Bravo is counting on it, shelving a special "Kathy Griffin: D-List A-Hole" series to make way for "The Rather Juice-E Detective Agency." It will air Tuesdays at 9pm starting September 12.

- Rich Gray
Contributing Writer

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Disney cancels release of 'Into The Woods' after American witches threaten to cast a spell on moviegoers and turn them all into newts «» CBS airs pilot of new mini-series "Little Immigrant On The Prairie" instead of Obama speech, wins ratings for night «» CBS cancels new Bill Cosby show, "Women Make The Darnedest Allegations" «» North Pole mainframe hacked and Kim Jong-un's name moved to 'Good' list; North Korea denies responsibility «» The National Association for the Advancement of Colored Double Amputees launches nationwide protests against police brutality of unarmed black men «» NHL puts rest of season on hiatus due to widespread case of the sniffles, says rinks are "too chilly for these princesses" «» Congress asks Santa Claus for 2015 budget for Christmas, or collectible Hess trucks and some ribbon candy if that's more practical «» Senate Intelligence Committee releases another scathing report detailing how President George W. Bush used to cheat at Parcheesi during White House Friday night game nights «» CIA sends 200 agents to UDC Community College for waterboarding refresher course to prepare for up and coming international terrorist groups «» New report finds 95% of lemon-flavored candy tastes like Pledge. Another report finds that a surprising number of people have tasted Pledge. «»